Warning: Lots of bad behavior, language, and a butt shot. Read at your own risk!
"Hi! I'm Natalie, one of your new roommates. I'm also the student body president, and I want to extend a warm welcome to Llama University, home of the Llamas." Natalie was the perky, cheerleader type, Colin decided, guaranteed to drive him f*cking nuts, unless he gave her mouth something better to do than jabber at him.
He noticed how tight and short her pink skirt was, coupled with her high pink heels, she was one hot chick. He could tell the attraction went both ways, Colin had been with so many females, he could read the f*ck me signs on them like a f*cking billboard. The way her eyes roamed over his body, her blushes, how she licked her lips, and leaned ever so slightly towards him...
He didn't understand exactly what it was about him that drove women crazy, but he wasn't complaining, f*ck no, he f*cking gloried in it. Good girls or bad, it didn't matter, they all fell effortlessly into his bed, they offered, and he took. He made sure that he satisfied each girl that he f*cked, physically anyway. Emotional was out of the question. "How warm?" he asked her.
Natalie stared at him blankly. "Whatever do you mean?"
Colin shrugged. "A f*ucking warm welcome to me is if you stripped down and..." he whispered something in her ear.
She blushed scarlet red, and stuttered a bit, looking for something to reply to that. She looked at him nervously, and then she grinned, as if she had finally figured something out. "Oh, you're a funny guy, aren't you? Ha ha, that was really, uh, funny."
"F*ck no, I was totally f*cking serious. Are you game?"
"You were...serious?" Natalie asked, shocked. "You just come right up to a perfect stranger and ask her, ask her, if she wants, well," Natalie blushed some more, "I can't believe your temerity in even asking..." She huffed, flustered, "I've never done oral sex at all," she stated primly, "let alone with a stranger!" She glared at him.
Her eyes were f*cking eating him alive though, she just wanted to play the f*cking game, start off with all the f*cking niceties that meant sh*t, but Colin didn't do games. "F*ck baby, you turn me on with that f*cking prissy attitude. I'd be more than happy to initiate you into the delights of uh, what did you call it? Oral sex." He mocked her words. Colin had figured out pretty early in his life, that the worse he treated them, the more they loved it, and the more they craved him. They had f*cked in the head thinking, but it worked in his favor, besides, he just didn't do nice. "Or we could just f*ck."
She screeched. "I cannot believe you just said that! I'll have you know that I am not," she stumbled in her words, "I'm not that type of girl. And..." Colin tuned her out, here was the blah, blah, blah, part, where they each tried to convince him of their virginal stellar qualities. It was all bullsh*t, all he had to do was wait until she got all those f*cking words out of her system, and then he'd shut her the f*ck up...Colin style.
She was f*cking long winded, he'd give her that. He noticed his two buddies, and some other people he hadn't met yet, watching them through the curtains. F*cking b*tch, maybe he would make her beg him first. He sighed, after several more minutes of listening to her bullsh*t, he'd had enough. It was time to shut her the f*ck up. He leaned in, and planted a kiss on her lips, shutting off the flow of her words.
He took his time, kissing her, keeping his hands to himself, and just let their lips and tongue touch and meet. He could feel the moment she surrendered to him, and he pulled back. She stared at him, then as predictable as the rest, she launched herself at him, locking her lips onto his, greedy, acting like she couldn't get enough of him.
He let his hands roam over her body, pulling her tighter up against his body, fondling her in full view of anyone watching, all she could do was moan, and writhe against him. It was all too easy anymore, and not much of a challenge, but his body didn't care that she wasn't a challenge. It just wanted release. "Not here." she finally groaned, "please." Colin effortlessly picked her up as she wound her arms around him, and he found the nearest bed.
Colin quietly got dressed, highly aware of her still naked body, and of her eyes on his body. "You're going somewhere."
She said it more like a statement, but Colin chose to answer it like a question. "Party." he said briefly. He heard the thundering of footsteps, and then pounding on the bedroom door.
"Colin!" Jake yelled. He pounded the door some more. "Colin! Are you ready?"
Without another word to Natalie, Colin stepped over to the door and opened it; Jake practically fell into the room. "What the hell Jake?"
Jake grinned up at him, then he noticed Natalie lying naked on the bed, and he whistled. "Wooweee! That's some..." Colin pushed his friend out of the room, shutting the door behind him.
"You have a girlfriend Einstein, remember?"
"I remember. That just means I can't touch, but I can look all I want." Colin just rolled his eyes. Once they arrived at the party, Colin made a beeline for the kegger.
When he looked up, his eyes widened in appreciation. D*mn. This was his kind of party, the women didn't even bother with clothes! He set his drink down, and followed the naked woman.
By the time he stumbled back to his dorm in the wee hours of the morning, Natalie had already gone to sleep.
Colin fell into his own bed, but he didn't sleep very well, he kept having the same nightmare over and over and over.
When he woke up, he woke up in a foul mood, his stinky roommate didn't help improve it either. "Go take a f*cking shower retard." Colin snarled. "Your f*cking stinking up this sh*thole."
"I beg your pardon?"
"You f*cking stink a*shole. Go take a f*cking shower!"
Daniel lifted his nose up. "I'll have you know that taking a shower everyday is a waste of our natural resources. I am committed to saving our planet, and I refuse to take a daily shower. Once a week, tops."
Colin's eyes narrowed. "What the f*ck did you say?"
"I said, and I'll speak slowly since you seem to be a slow wit, that I am not taking a shower today."
Colin started hysterically laughing. "I thought you f*cking said that, you f*cking retard. I'm going to f*cking kick your a*s your little f*cking nerd. I'm the one that's f*ckig in charge as*hole, and you'll do what the f*ck I say, and you'll be f*cking respectful about it too."
"If you touch me, I'll have you thrown out of this school so fast that..." Daniel started to say.
Colin jumped him, and used his fists to do his talking for him, words were so overrated anyway. Too much blah, blah, blah, Colin preferred action. He pummeled Daniel's ribs and stomach, pouring out his rage and bad humor on Daniel. Daniel howled in pain, but Colin didn't let up. He was going to teach the f*cking retard a lesson.
"Stop! Please!" Daniel yelled frantically. "Ow! Stop! You're breaking my ribs!"
"F*cking as*wipe, you'll have more respect for me next time, won't you, you f*cking stupid nerd?"
"Please stop!" Daniel sobbed. "Stop!"
"What the f*ck do you think I'll do to you little f*cker if you go squealing to the authorities, huh?" Colin punched him some more in the ribs, making Daniel sob harder.
"I don't know!" Daniel cried. "I don't know!"
"I'll f*cking kill you that's what. I'll find you, you little f*cker, you'll never get away. I'll find you and string you up by your f*cking guts, after I slice a few parts off, do you understand?"
"Yes, yes I understand. Please stop hitting me, I promise I won't say a word. Not one word."
"You owe me a f*cking apology retard."
"I'm sorry Colin, very sorry."
"Did I say you could f*cking call me by name?"
"No Sir." Daniel cringed. "Please don't hit me again Sir."
Colin pulled Daniel up by the back of his neck and tossed him into the wall, Daniel landed with a thud. "That's more f*cking like it retard."
"Now, what the f*ck are you going to do?"
Daniel winced as he slowly picked himself up off the floor. He kept his eyes downcast as he answered timidly, "Take a shower?"
"F*cking A right, you are. If I tell you to f*cking lick my toes, what the hell are you going to do?"
"Lick your toes."
Colin nodded. "Now get the f*ck out of here, and shower that skank off your a*s." Colin shook his head, stupid f*cking roommates.
"Yes sir!" Daniel hurried out of the room as fast as he could go. He felt like passing out from the pain, but he was afraid of what Colin might do to him if he did.
The human punching bag had restored some of Colin's good humor though, just enough that he just might get through the first day of classes after all. After a couple of minutes of deep contemplation, he had decided to be a lifeguard, one, just to piss his parents off who were spending a minor fortune sending him to this school, and two, hot chicks in bikinis. What could be better?
Colin stared at the skeleton. What the f*ck? He didn't get why the hell he had to study the human body to be a lifeguard. He should have gone to art class instead, at least they got to stare at naked chicks, instead of dead dried up bones.
"Let's see what this does." he muttered to himself. He started pushing a lot of buttons at once on the fancy machine.
The skeleton went into overdrive, the bony arms and legs floundered as they moved back and forth faster and faster. Colin started to laugh. "It's eating it's own f*cking leg!" he hooted.
"Mr. Kahekili, that is enough of that!" Professor Sneech reprimanded him. "The skeleton is a tool for learning, not a toy."
"F*cking killjoy." Colin muttered. He picked up the skeleton and heaved it over the fence.
"Mr. Kahekili!" Professor Sneech yelled. "You will see me after class."
"Yeah, I'll f*cking do that." Colin rolled his eyes, as if. This class was f*cking stupid. He pulled a hacky sack out of his jacket pocket, and stared at it for a moment as memories flooded in. Every once in a while his Dad would get off from work early, and he and Colin would play hacky sack in the front yard. His old man had been pretty good at it too, doing f*cking trick stunts and all. Colin tossed the memory aside, he didn't want to think about his father. He started kicking the bag around.
"It's trying to get me!" Mika screamed. Colin turned around to see what his classmate was carrying on about. He shook his head. Mika wasn't the brightest bulb in the universe, but her kind was uncomplicated, and Colin could definitely appreciate that.
He half jogged, half walked over to her. "I'll rescue you." he said, and he pulled her into a long kiss. It took her less than half a second to respond by kissing him back.
"Mr. Kahekili, that kind of behavior is inappropriate for a classroom. I expect to see you in my office, and pronto."
Colin ignored the Professor, he even ignored the sudden dark clouds and pouring rain, he just kept making out with Mika, who was enthusiastically urging him on with her wandering hands. "Let's go somewhere." he whispered in her ear.
Mika grinned back at him. "My place?"
After skipping the next class to go f*ck Mika, Colin decided to just take the rest of the day off. Classes were too f*cking boring anyway, and the Professor's were no fun. When he stepped back into his dorm, he was waylaid by his roommate Blake Lively, and boy did she own up to her name.
"I hear you like showers." she breathed.
"Cleanliness is next to godliness." Colin quoted with a smirk.
"I like to f*ck in the shower? How about you?"
"F*ck yeah." Colin followed her into the girls' bathroom, she stripped and jumped into the shower. Colin followed suit. He loved showers, there was no clean up involved. When the water finally started to grow cold, he jumped out first, letting Blake have the last of the warm water to rinse off. Who said he wasn't a nice guy?
"I'm holding a protest about unfair Grading practices." Colin said, handing the female student a flyer. "You're welcome to join in." He eyed her, "Clothes are optional." He grinned charmingly at her.
"Unfair grading practices?" she echoed, as she stared at the flyer he handed her.
"Yep." Colin nodded his head. "The Professors are f*cking control freaks, that hold you by the balls, er, boobs maybe for females, if you don't learn their way, they f*cking flunk you. Now how is that for fair?"
"I wouldn't have taken you for an activist?"
"I'm all about f*cking right and wrong baby." Colin said. He had been at University for a few months now, going to class when it suited him, and most times it didn't suit him. Which pissed his parents off whenever they talked to him on their weekly phone call. Neither one could seem to understand that the Professors were f*cking stupid pr*cks. They seemed to have something against Colin too, whenever he did bother to show up for class.
The f*cking University President had stepped in, and told him he's better become a better team player, or he was out. Protests had been suggested as a good way for Colin to better integrate into University life. Colin couldn't agree more. He could stage protests, protests like the college had never seen before. He handed out more flyers as the students passed by.
Once he had handed out all of his flyers, he stood up onto the temporary podium, and cleared his throat. "Hey you f*cking Professors!" Colin hollered out. "I have something to say to you f*ckers!"
"You guys are f*cking character profiling, and that is f*cking illegal! Just because I f*cking learn hands on instead of out of your f*cking boring a*s books, doesn't mean I should be penalized because you guys are so f*cking old and stupid, you don't know how to teach me properly, or the people like me!" A small crowd was starting to gather around Colin, and they all cheered at his words, some had even shown up with signs, and they were enthusiastically waving them around.
Colin paused a moment, and waved at the crowd. Then he started speaking again, and he used some of his mother's psychobabble, he had heard it often enough as a kid. Stuff like how there shouldn't be any winners or losers, because it would damage people's psyche, and all the other bullsh*t nonsense she used to preach at his him. The crowd ate it up, and began chanting, growing and swelling into larger and larger numbers. "I ought to f*cking sue your a*ses, my family has enough money for me to do so. Then I'll f*cking replace the whole lot of you with Professors that know their own as*hole from a hole in the wall."
The protest went on for hours, with only a few people daring enough to shout out their disagreements. Colin took a mental picture of what they looked like, he would settle the score with them later. When the protest finally ended, Colin hung around afterwards, and shook hands with everyone that came up to tell him what a brilliant speech that had been, and they totally supported his ideas. Colin urged them to let their student union presidents know their thoughts and feelings, today was the day to f*cking change the future!
He spotted one of the loud mouthed as*holes that had dared to tell him he was full of sh*t. Colin was well aware he was full of sh*t, but that didn't change things, the as*hole dared to talk disrespectfully to him and about him, and Colin wouldn't tolerate that. At all.
"Hey as*hole! Yeah you, what the f*ck do you think you were doing? Shooting your stupid f*cking mouth off at sh*t you didn't even know a f*cking thing about!"
"It's a free country, I can say whatever I want, whenever I want."
"Are you that f*cking stupid sh*thead?"
"Oh no!" Larry moaned from behind Colin. "All those garbage words, oh dear, I hope you're not going to hurt Darren!"
"What are you going to do about it?" Darren scoffed, ignoring the warning that was in Larry's words. "Beat me up?"
"F*ck yeah." Colin responded as he lunged at him, Larry squealed like a little girl behind him.
Colin mercilessly pounded on Darren, who tried to fight back at first, but Colin easily overpowered him.
The small crowd that was still hanging around after the Protest gathered around him and started chanting, "Colin! Colin!"
Darren started howling in pain. "I give! I give! Ow! Stop! I give!"
Colin kept pounding on him. "F*ck you as*hole. You ain't gonna f*cking walk for a week when I'm done with your sorry a*s. If you run off and tattle tale, I'll come back and finish the job!" Colin snarled.
Darren's howls turned into sobs, "Please!" he moaned.
Colin pushed Darren away, and then kicked him once for good measure. The crowd hooted and hollered behind him, clapping their hands at Darren's defeat. "F*cking as*hole, pansy as*. You have a f*cking big mouth, but you can't back it up. Are you going to go f*cking tattle tale now, so that I can rip off your f*cking balls and feed it to you piece by piece?"
"No," Darren wheezed. "I've thought about it, and I agree with your position."
"Be sure to f*cking tell the Student Union."
"Yes sir." Darren got up, and limped off.
Just then Colin got two text messages. One from Ruby, about a one on one party, and another from his father. Colin scowled at his phone and the words that were displayed on it. Call me, very important. He dialed his Dad's phone number, and waited for him to pick up. He didn't have long to wait. "What the f*ck Dad, you called last night, I have another week before the obligatory weekly call."
"Colin, does the name Tomeka Sepulveda ring any bells?"
"Tomeka came by the house last night, she had an infant boy with her, Jacob. She claims the boy is yours, and that she can't take care of him anymore. So we have assumed responsibility for him, and set him up with a crib and everything in the spare room."
"What the f*ck Dad? Why the hell did you do that? I paid the b*tch to get rid of it, and you f*cking let her bring it home? What the f*ck?" Colin shouted into his phone, pissed off at his father, and at Tomi, the stupid b*itch. She f*cking lied to him.
"He's your son Colin, he's family." Ryder sighed. "We'll talk more about this later, once you've calmed down."
F*cking calm down, right. Colin seethed. He didn't want a f*cking kid, what the hell was he going to do with one? The stupid b*tch should have taken care of it, like they had agreed. Colin looked at the other text message. That was just what he needed, a one on one party with Ruby. Less than ten minutes later he was on her doorstep, and inside her dorm.
F*cking helped him clear his mind, and he had to laugh at the absurdity of it all. What the f*ck did he care if his Dad had brought it home? He wasn't f*cking there to raise it anyway, he was here, getting a f*cking education, so he could make something of himself. He laughed again, bitterly. "I have to go." he told Ruby, as he threw his clothes back on.
"So soon?" she pouted.
Colin winked at her, as he left the room. "F*ck you soon." She blew a kiss at him, but he didn't see it, he was already gone.
When he got back to his Dorm, he found Jake in the kitchen smoking a cigarette.
"There's a f*cking stranger stealing my cigarettes, the as*hole." Jake and Rom had both decided to actually try to get good grades and graduate, with honors, of all things. They had turned into regular little nerds, doing all of their homework, participating in study groups, the whole nine yards. Colin had called them f*cking traitors, they had simply responded that they didn't have the luxury of goofing off like he did. They had to actually make a living when they graduated, unlike him. What the hell ever. He couldn't wait for break, then maybe his two friends would actually be some fun again.
"Hello to you too." Jake said mildly, as he took another drag off the cigarette. "Bad night?" he asked, after Colin went around the kitchen opening things up, only to slam them closed again.
"You could say that." Colin muttered. "The B*tch didn't f*cking get rid of it? Can you f*cking believe that? And then my f*cking father has to go and f*cking let her bring it home!" Colin slammed another cupboard door. What the f*ck did he care anyway? He didn't, he told himself, as he slammed another cupboard door.
Jake nodded, as he decoded Colin's words. "Tomi had the kid then."
"Yeah, the b*tch. Didn't she even think about me? And how the hell it would affect me? What a b*tch."
Jake grinned at him. "Congrats Daddy, it's a???"
"Boy as*hole. And f*ck you and your f*cking congratulations."
"Still not your type Col, sorry." Jake ducked as Colin threw a half hearted punch at him. "Blake's in the shower though. I think I heard her moaning your name."
"As*hole." Colin muttered, then he perked up. "The shower?" Jake nodded again, and Colin headed upstairs to the shower. He stripped and slid silently behind her, she squeaked when she felt his hands on her.
"Who the f*ck else?"
Rom came out of the bathroom stall. "What the hell Colin!?" he yelled over Blake's pants and Colin's moans. "Couldn't you have the f*cking decency to f*ck somewhere else, instead of in front of a starving guy?" Rom complained. "You're a f*cking as*hole!" Rom's girlfriend, Ashley McKinley, waited for him back at home. It had been months since he had last seen her though, and while they talked on the phone several nights a week, it still wasn't the same.
"Sorry Dude!" Colin laughed.
"F*cking liar." Rom muttered as he left the bathroom. He picked up his cell phone and called his girlfriend. Maybe he could talk her into phone sex?
The next day Colin received the news that his protest had been hugely successful.
Colin snorted. The stupid f*cking idiots, making him out to be some kind of hero. He was many things, but a hero he was not.
Notes: Colin is outrageous, lol I spent a lot of time thinking---I wonder what happens if I do this? Then I would try it out, and see what happens. Like go for the Heat of the Moment Kiss on Natalie mere moments after Colin met her. She liked it, and pulled him back for more. They went to instant romantic status, and headed straight for the nearest bed. Color me shocked, lol :P I was all prepared to take pics of her slapping his face at such inappropriateness, but, nope. Turns out she is insane too, lol And egads! All the bedhopping, good grief, Colin never studied, rarely went to class, he cheated on his tests, got caught a few times, had to go clear his name, which worked, then he cheated again, and passed his tests with flying colors, lol I sent him to Uni for 2 sim weeks, and they were chock full of Colin crazy, I've barely started on his college days, lol
True to his roll, Colin gets into lots of fights. At least once a week, but he gets so delighted and happy after a fight, he usually rolls the wish for more fights, so sometimes he has several fights in a week. And more woohoo, he rolls lots of wants for woohoo. Yep, that's pretty much what's been on his mind!
Until he got the news anyway. Little Jacob is child number one of Gen. 8, he is part of the active family. He was actually born before Colin went to University, I added him into the house after Tomi had him using MC.
One other roll reveal, I used the freebie of picking a career when a new EP comes out, and I picked Lifeguard because I thought it suited Colin much better. I can't even remember what his original career roll was. He is super cute as a Lifeguard though! <3
I put decensor in my game for the first time ever. I actually prefer the blur, but I absolutely hate the dark grey rectangles that happened after the IP patch. That drove me crazy, so I finally did away with the blur. It still startles me a bit to see naked sims running about, especially in University. Lots of streakers! lol
Funny pic here, ha ha, this is some sort of fairy interaction, I can't remember what it is called atm. I call it, "Fairy Funny" lol
Thanks for reading!!! =)